All the Live-Long Day

I woke up this morning thinking, "Here comes another day of staying on my plan."

I'm not complaining!  Some days are inspirational, some days are depressing, and some days are...well...just days.  This feels like a day.  Another day in my new lifestyle.  Another step toward my goal.  No earth-shattering lessons.  No agony of defeat.  Just a normal day.

It's also meeting day, which means I get to weigh in there and they are going to give me another five-pound sticker.  (You get a sticker every time you lose five pounds.)  I love it.  Here I am, 56 years old, and getting a sticker still makes me feel good.  It's a blue star.  I'd feel even better if it was sparkly!

So here's to "just days".  We all have 'em.  We all need 'em.  They are a gift from God.  Hugs!

O, Me of Little Faith

Yes, I was a little bit whiney in my post yesterday.

This picture represents my daily weight chart...going downhill but bumpy along the way.  Yesterday's weigh-in (the one that counts) happened to hit one of the bumps.  Of course today my weight was down again, so I know I'm still making progress toward my goal.

With all my pouting, I didn't notice until later in the day that even with just the lousy .6 pound loss, I had lost 10% of my starting weight!  This is one of the big milestones in Weight Watchers, and it comes with big positive health changes.  Woohoo!

I'm dealing with a malady faced by many dieters: focusing too much on the numbers!  I think it's an aspect of the obsessive-compulsive behavior that fueled my overeating for so many years--that ALL OR NOTHING PERFECTIONISM that can be a death sentence to a healthy, well-balanced life.  I'm making great progress toward health, but I need to remember that the underlying issues that led to my mass poundage are going to crop up now and again.  This road to health and wellness inevitably involves finding and healing old wounds.  I'm so thankful the Great Physician is on this journey with me.  Even when I stumble I can keep going forward, because I know He will help me with every step along the way.

Weigh Day - Total Loss 27.6 pounds

What?  Six Tenths of a pound?

My weight was a pound less than this yesterday. 

Sigh.  Guess I should be grateful for any loss.  Next week will be better.  Etc. and so on. 

Trying to smile...

Sabotage!

 

You love being with your friends.  Parties.  Dinner at someone's house. It's a powerful social force.  It takes a lot of energy to resist the "dig in" mentality.

And sometimes, you get worn down.  You know you shouldn't, but you want to.  You want to be like everybody else.  You want the pizza and beer.  You want the sugar-and-fat-laden dessert.  You get tired of saying, "No, thank you," especially when your stomach is growling.  You wish your friends wouldn't put you in that situation.  You think, "If they really loved me, they wouldn't tempt me like this."

You might even get angry.  You might resent the fact that they don't seem to appreciate how hard this is for you.  They invite you over for dinner, and serve something off-the-charts fattening.  And you eat just a little of it, even though you're still hungry, because you're trying to stay on your plan.  And then you realize, the holidays are coming.  It's going to get worse.  And you're scared.  You don't know if you're strong enough.  You want to hide out for the next three months and rejoin the world after all the food-festing is over.

Because you know what's coming.  Your favorites.  Pumpkin pie.  Mashed potatoes and turkey gravy.  Homemade rolls.  Christmas cookies.  An unending variety of yummy treats served at every social occasion between now and the end of the year.  And you'll say, "No, thank you," and they'll say, "But it's the holidays!" or,  "It's a party!" or, "I made this just for you!"

And you'll have to choose between taking care of yourself or what seems to be taking care of your friendship by eating the food you know you shouldn't eat but that you want to eat because you know it's going to taste like heaven AND save your friendship.  At least that's how you'll feel at that moment.  Because you love your friends.

But the holidays are scary.

So you steel yourself.  You vow to enjoy the holidays in a healthy way.  You stand in front of the mirror, smile, and practice saying, "No, thank you."  and "I've had enough!"  and "That looks delicious!"  You don't put the responsibility for staying on your plan on THEM.  You remember that even though you've already lost almost 30 pounds, you still have a long way to go.  You don't want to lose your momentum.  You take a deep breath.  You pray.  You forgive your friends for trying to make you eat foods you know you shouldn't eat, or to eat more than you know you should have.  You love your friends. 

You eat breakfast.  You get out your food tracker and write down what you ate.  You take your vitamins, then go outside for a morning walk.  You thank God that you have friends to love.

Three Days in the Condo

Scrubbing.  Painting.  Squatting.  Staining. 

I used this cat picture today for two reasons:  (1) I've been wanting to use this cat picture, and (2) it pretty accurately represents what I looked like--especially the hair--on my way home from the condo last night.

I devoted three entire days to the project of getting this place ready to rent out in an effort to Get It Done.  We're almost there.  My WW activity points are off the chart from all the gymnastics I've been doing over there, and every joint in my body is crying out for mercy.

Some will say that we're putting in too much effort for a rental.  It HAS been exhausting.  But I am reminded that we are to do everything as if unto the Lord.  (Col 3:23 - "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men," NIV84)  I'm guessing that applies to preparing a property for rental, as well as dieting, and--come to think of it--even blogging.  Hugs.

The Adventure Continues

Had to go buy another size smaller of jeans yesterday.  I went ahead and got the next size down, too.  Optimism!

Having to keep buying smaller clothes could get expensive.  We will file this thought under "Good Problems".  But it also gives me a little mental pause...to consider the major changes that may be coming my way because of the journey I am on.

It's not just getting smaller, or learning to eat healthier and being more active.  Every journey we take in life has the potential to change who we are as we gain new perspectives and experiences.  I started this journey simply because I was disgusted with my size and wanting to lose weight.  Finally.  But as I travel down the path to a thinner body I'm noticing other, unexpected changes along the way...like God drawing me closer to Him.  And realizing I am so blessed to have a community of friends who are willing to walk alongside me (that's you!)  I used to live an isolated, lonely life.  And now it seems, the smaller I get, the larger my world becomes.

Jesus did say you have to lose your life in order to find it.  I don't think He was talking about dieting.  Then again, the more I let go of my old securities (like eating to calm myself down) and turn instead to my Heavenly Father, the more security I find.  Makes me wonder what else I'm hanging onto that I could release into His infinte care.

Hugs.

You get what you pay for...

I have three dieting friends who in as many days have said the same thing to me:  "I don't want to give up my fattening foods!"  They talk to me about how much they miss their favorite foods.  I wonder how long they will stay with their programs.  This used to be me.  I could get on a diet, but I couldn't quit thinking about wanting to eat donuts.

And consequently, I couldn't stay on the diet.

This time is different.  I truly want to change the way I eat for the rest of my life. That means giving up my eating habits from the past 56 years.  I'm trading them in for something new.  Everything has a price.  My old lifestyle purchased me an out-of-shape-overweight body.  The in-shape-normal-weight body is going to cost me, too.  It's costing learning new habits, new ways of eating, thinking and moving, and interacting with people. 

 I'm investing in a new life!