Monday, March 26, 2012
Not So Simple After All
It was fun while it lasted. Too fun. Obviously. I guess I took a little diet vacation--with restraints.
Also, this week is going to be challenging. Today is my son's birthday. Tomorrow is our 29th anniversary. Wednesday is (please!) another fattening meal at church. Saturday is my birthday. Big week of celebrations. I need to go back to the safety net of counting points and enjoying my food life within those constraints.
I have to admit, I'm struggling. This is the longest I've ever stayed on a diet. Yea! I have to remember now that what I'm doing is NOT a diet, but a new way of life. The constant barrage of FOOD in our society, however, WEARS A PERSON DOWN. I hate to say it, but church is the worst place for me to be regarding my eating. Yesterday we welcomed new members with a giant cake which happened to be my favorite kind of cake in the whole world. When I saw it, I said out loud, "Step away from the cake!" and walked past it and directly to the car. Didn't even stay and visit. I've already decided I'm not going to attend the meal on Wednesday. There won't be anything there I can eat, or that I even want to eat.
I'm sitting here, writing, and it's dawning on me that this new way of life has the potential to separate me from some of my friends. Nothing simple about that realization! I'm just tired. Tired of saying no. Tired of constantly being in situations where I have to say no. Oh, yeah. "No, thank you."
Change...real change...is not simple. It's reasonable to expect that I'm going to mourn a bit along the way. So, I'm not discouraged by my sad mood this morning. In a way, I'm encouraged that I'm willing to endure the pain of these changes so that I can look forward to a healthier life. It's time to tell myself that everything is going to be okay.