Sunday, September 23, 2012

Did I Do That?

Along this journey, I have experienced a few "aha" moments.

Other realizations have been slower to emerge.  They begin as nagging suspicions, which often I turn away from and choose to ignore.  But then, something happens that brings something to the surface.

Something like, for example, thinking you are having a heart attack and ending up having gallbladder surgery.

As I recover from the surgery two days ago, I'm realizing that being able to overcome my eating issues means coming face to face with who I am...really.  It means accepting my faults, and becoming willing to make improvements where I can.  It also means, somehow, learning to love myself in spite of those obvious or not-so-obvious shortcomings I find in my own nature.

The thing that has been bubbling to the surface in these recent days is how impatient I am...have always been.  Impatient with myself.  Impatient with others.  With the world.  I am always looking for the "quick fix".  The get-it-over-with thing to do.  I'm the person who prays for patience and follows up with, "..and I want it right now!"

I'm feeling impatient right now because, even though I have been faithfully counting my points and eating correctly, my weight has gone up a couple of pounds.  I'm not thinking about all that my body has been through in the past week, and frankly, I am way out of line.  Instead of being grateful that my problem was diagnosed and dealt with, I'm stomping my foot and pouting about a couple of temporary pounds.

So, this is a picture of me telling myself to take it easy.  Be patient.  Take responsibility and move on. I know in the past I have given up on healthy eating because I didn't see the results when I wanted to see them.  I need to learn that healthy eating is a worthy goal all by itself, with or without accompanying weight loss.

Hugs.

2 comments:

  1. Hi Cindy,

    Ok. First, I forget how fabulous you look! You are probably used to looking in the mirror and seeing the new you, but it still catches me off guard to see a current picture of you, since I don't see you that often. I hope you realize what you have accomplished!!!

    Second, your body has been through a major trauma. It's bound to be a little mixed up. But I can tell you that those 2 pesky little pounds are not showing in this picture!

    Love you,
    Your sister

    ReplyDelete

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