Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Anxious Eating

Today I was thinking about eating . . a lot.  Probably because there's a lot going on in my life right now, and I'm feeling very anxious.  In the past, anxious feelings always led me to turn to food, especially really fattening food, which I would then eat. 

We're talking juicy hamburgers, greasy french fries, mashed potatoes with lots of cream gravy, macaroni and cheese, donuts, hot bread with lots of butter.....etc. ad nauseum.

Here's how it would go:  (1) feel anxious (2) eat mass quantities of junk food (3) forget about what made me feel anxious (4) instead feel bad about eating too much.

I don't do this any more, but the anxious feelings still come and go, still make me think about wanting to eat.  Today I dealt with my anxious feelings by eating, but just a little bit at a time.  A container of yogurt here.  A banana there.  A few baby carrots in the other place.  Oh, and drinking lots of water.  They say it makes you feel full...really?  It doesn't really comfort me the way those fattening foods used to.

I survived to the end of the day without any regrets about my food choices.  I know that if I had "gone wild" and eaten off my plan, it would not have made me feel better.  In fact, I would feel worse.  So, I'm still feeling anxious, but not about over eating.  I know this is a victory.  I just don't really feel victorious.  But something tells me that learning to live with my uncomfortable feelings instead of trying to eat them away is a good thing. 

This must be what everybody means when they say, "Take it one day at a time."  I made it through today.  WooHoo!

1 comment:

  1. How wonderful that you persevered. Every "little" victory like this is so huge. You are an inspiration to me! Woohoo!
    Love you,
    Your sister

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