Tuesday, February 7, 2012
The Storm After the Calm
Sometimes it seems all I think about is food and eating. Yes, I'm counting my points. Yes, I'm losing weight. Yes, I'm a third of the way to my goal.
But. Every day is hard. I put on a happy face. Do the best I can. Pray.
But. Doubts creep in. I'm approaching a point in my weight loss beyond which I have not traveled in over 20 years. Can I break through the barrier?
Last night I "stressed ate" a bowl of baby carrots. I wanted a maragarita. So bad. Earlier in the day I had fought off the temptation to eat a donut. Had to call my husband to "talk me down." Today I find myself immobilized...unable to accomplish anything except that I am Not Eating. The struggle feels unrelated to the success. The success does not ease the struggle.
Every day is hard. But some days are harder than others.