Friday, October 21, 2011

On Changing ...

Many years ago I had a bizarre dieting experience.  I had lost some weight, and was driving down Ming Avenue on a beautiful day with the windows down, my left arm resting on the door.  I needed to change lanes, and that's when it happened.  I glanced over my left shoulder and caught a glimpse of this thin arm that was right next to me.  I wondered whose arm that was, then of course realized it was mine.  But it didn't feel like mine.  It didn't feel like it belonged to me.

The experience really shook me up.  My body was getting smaller but my mind hadn't made the connection.  I was out of sync.  It disturbed me so much that I naturally freaked out and started gaining weight so I would recognize my own arm again.  Smart, huh?

Since then, I've thought about this experience a lot.  First of all, it's silly to go on a diet and be surprised when your body gets smaller.  Yet, I was surprised!  Even though I wanted to change, I was accustomed to seeing myself a certain way.  We get used to things that we live with every day for years and years.  They start to feel normal.  And sometimes, when those things start to change, even for the better, it can be a little unsettling.

So I entered this adventure secure in the knowledge that my body was going to change, and it is!  My arms are getting smaller, along with the rest of me.  Sometimes I just hold up my left arm and look at it and claim it as my own.  But I am still being surprised!  I expected and was prepared for my body to change, but inside I'm changing too.  I'm starting to feel differently about the person I am, the person God created me to be.  I feel a quiet confidence I never knew before.  I used to be a couch potato, and now I WANT to MOVE and keep busy.  I am actually ENJOYING eating healthy, delicious foods, instead of seeing it as a drudgery or a punishment. 

All of which brings me to the real point of this post.  I realized this morning that I should expect more changes in the months to come, and not just physical or related to dieting.  I should be on the lookout for the changes God wants to make in my attitudes, in my awareness, in my willingness to submit myself, mind and body, to Him.  He's working on an Extreme Makeover here!  I know He has wonderful plans for me, but I have to be willing to let go of all that "stuff" I've been clinging to in order to get to His Big Reveal.  It may be a little scary from time to time, but when that happens I know He will pat my skinny arm and tell me everything is going to be okay.

1 comment:

  1. Hi Cindy,
    Extreme Makeover! I love it. I'm just thinking that you are doing what we studied at our last retreat--Surrendering. You have surrendered to His will, to His desires for your life. I predict a beautiful result from this makeover--inside and out!
    Love you,
    Your sister


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