Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Sometimes Life Hurts

I love dogs.  There was one on the freeway yesterday.  A beautiful Golden Retriever who ran in front of the six cars (which swerved to miss it) in the lanes to my right, and then right in front of my car.  I hit the brakes.  I swerved.  But I still hit the beautiful dog. 

I looked in the rearview mirror.  The dog was in the median, licking its obviously hurting hind legs.  It was obvious to me that his legs were hurting because I knew I had run over them. 

I felt sick.  My friend got on her cell phone and called the appropriate authorities to come pick the dog up.  I prayed that they would come quickly, and either be able to treat him or put him out of his misery. 

My friend started to reassure me.  I didn't lose control of the car.  There could have been a terrible accident involving several cars and we needed to be grateful that didn't happen.  We couldn't stop on the freeway to help the dog because that also would not be safe and could have caused an accident.

All the things she said were true, but I was still heartbroken.  I went through the motions of my day, but wasn't functioning very well.  I couldn't concentrate.  I kept replaying the incident in my mind.  When I got home I sat on the couch and cried.

The one thing I didn't do was eat inappropriately.  It didn't occur to me until later that I had not reacted to this terrible incident with an overwhelming desire to eat away my sad and uncomfortable feelings.  This is something new.  One small pinpoint of light in the midst of a truly dark day.

I'll never forget what happened yesterday.  Those memories will always hurt.  But I hope I will also remember that I didn't react to the hurt with eating, which would have caused further hurt and which couldn't have helped that dog, or me, or anyone else.  Sometimes all we can do is cry.


You said You'd come and share all my sorrows,
You said You'd be there for all my tomorrows;
I came so close to sending You away,
But just like You promised You came there to stay;
I just had to pray!

And Jesus said, "Come to the water, stand by My side,
I know you are thirsty, you won't be denied;
I felt ev'ry teardrop when in darkness you cried,
And I strove to remind you that for those tears I died."

Your goodness so great I can't understand,
And, dear Lord, I know that all this was planned;
I know You're here now, and always will be,
Your love loosed my chains and in You I'm free;
But Jesus, why me?

And Jesus said, "Come to the water, stand by My side,
I know you are thirsty, you won't be denied;
I felt ev'ry teardrop when in darkness you cried,
And I strove to remind you that for those tears I died."

Jesus, I give You my heart and my soul,
I know that without God I'd never be whole;
Savior, You opened all the right doors,
And I thank You and praise You from earth's humble shores;
Take me, I'm Yours.

And Jesus said, "Come to the water, stand by My side,
I know you are thirsty, you won't be denied;
I felt ev'ry teardrop when in darkness you cried,
And I strove to remind you that for those tears I died."
(For Those Tears I Died by Marsha Stevens) 

1 comment:

  1. Hi Cindy,
    I use this familiar greeting that I've written a thousand times to you in emails over the last years. Between the emails and the phone calls we have experienced every up and down in our lives together. I'm so sorry for what happened, but I was so relieved to hear your laugh this morning on the phone. It's funny writing you here in this "public" place. You are such a gift to me. Thank you for being an example of what it really means to pray without ceasing by the way you are living your life. I love you.
    Love,
    Your sister

    ReplyDelete

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